LIKABILITY MATTERS

I ran across an article written by Jeff Haden in 2016; it has nothing to do with the COVID-19 but offers some great advice that is always in vogue. The following is a summary of his article: ”How to Be Exceptionally Likable: 11 Things Most Charming People Always Do.” Likability matters. It’s hard to trust someone you don’t like.

The 11 rules to gain likability:

1. They Shift the spotlight to others. No one receives enough praise. No one. So start by telling people what they did well.
2. They listen a lot more than they talk. Ask questions. Maintain eye contact. Smile. Frown. Nod. Respond – not so much verbally, but non-verbally.
3. They don’t practice selective hearing. Remarkably charismatic people listen closely to everyone, and they make all of us, regardless of our position or social status or “level,” feel like we have something important to say.
4. They’re thoughtful simply because they want to be. Instead of turning idle time into “me time,” likable people use their free time to do something nice – not because they’re expected to, but just because they can.
5. They focus on the speaker. Don’t check your phone. Don’t glance at your monitor. Don’t focus on anything else, even for a moment. Give the gift of your full attention.
6. They give before they receive – and sometimes they never receive. Never think about what you can get. Focus on what you can provide. Giving is the only way to establish a areal connection and relationship.
7. They don’t act self-important… The only people who are impressed by your stuffy, pretentious, self-important self are other stuffy, pretentious, self-important people.
8. They realize other people are more important. You don’t know what other people know, and everyone, no matter who he or she is, knows things you don’t know.
9. They choose their words. The words you use impact the attitude of others.
10. They don’t discuss the failings of others…  Don’t laugh at other people. When you do, the people around you wonder if you sometimes laugh at them.
11.  They readily admit their failings. Be humble. Share your screw-ups. Admit your mistakes. Be the cautionary tale.  And laugh at yourself.

Basic truths, but sometimes we need to be reminded of them.J  You can read more material by Jeff Haden by Googling his name